Amy on Tour

Winter Solstice 2011

2011-12-23T16:04:00.000-08:00

I was sickly the last ten days. But today I watched the sun shine through the little window in my humble abode, and I felt good. The blue skies looked promising, the warmth of my room comforted me. As I washed some clothes in the sink (the washer is down), my feet shuffled with the dubstep beating from my computer. A cup-half-full day for sure.

The future holds many wonderful things, and one of those wonderful things will be a return to my walks and other random urban outings. I feel out of touch with the rhythm of the city. How I miss lurking around these dry streets, watching familiar people emerge and disappear, moving like red blood cells through these city veins, encouraged by the pulse of some invisible, communal heart.

Since hidden in this room of mine, I've had to learn another rhythm. There is the hammering of the underworld, the internal world wanting to reveal things to me, wanting to show me the hidden parts of myself. In my moments of isolation, I saw her clearly before me, a reminder, a reopening of wounds.

Which leads me to the question- why was I sick? I mean, there's the usual answer- germs, bacteria, viruses, etc. There's the more holistic answers- stress, environment, imbalance.

But let's go further.

Let's play pretend.

Let's pretend that there are even other reasons, certain energies that demand to be noticed, maybe a certain lesson that I was not getting, so my body had to physically stop itself. I would say that the answer rests in those isolated moments, that heaviness that could drag me like a mob-style cement block to the bottom of the lake.

Maybe it all coincides with the Winter Solstice and the longest nights of the year.

Whatever the reason for being sick, I'm glad to be out of it. I am excited about venturing outside these walls and into nature. I am eager to see the return of the sun, feel its warmth on my face and its vibrant energy through my veins.

***

And with that all said and done, I just want to share a few photos from recent face painting gigs.

These three photos are from All Soul's Procession. I set up in front of Epic Cafe (University and 4th Avenue). Epic has been wonderful about allowing face painters to set up at their business for this event, so go over and have a drink and support them!

Face Painting at the All Soul's Procession in front of Epic Cafe.

Little Adrian is the squishiest calavera around!

Mis calaveritas favoritas! :)

This next photo of photographer Patrick McArdle is just wonderful! The beer, the gloves, the color and the face paint- it all falls together really well.

Patrick McArdle at Dinnerware for Food Round Up!

These last couple photos are of the Fourth Avenue Street Fair. The Street Fair was really sweet this year with kids who I had face painted before searching me out to paint them this time around. That always feels good.

Both photos were taken by Michael McNerney. He did a great job!

Day 1 of the Winter Fourth Avenue Street Fair

Festive skull. Day 3 of the Winter Fourth Avenue Street Fair

****

Now what? It's holiday time! Everyone is doing something, and so am I! :) I'll be traveling quite a bit, and think it will do me well to be one the move.

I hope you are all doing well.
Happy Solstice!

xoxo

Mr Head's and Southside Worker Center

2011-11-30T23:13:00.000-08:00

I have been away from my blog for months. There has been a new energy bubbling, and it's a beautiful thing to watch develop and grow. Life has been busy and joyous and full of travel. There is a lot to tell, but I will have to do it in bits, or the task will seem to daunting and I'll never finish it.

So bit number one, announcements directly related to art and music.

First, I will have two pieces hanging in Mr. Head's Art Gallery and Bar on 4th Avenue just north of 6th Street. They are larger than what I have been producing- each work is 12" x 36", acrylic on canvas. They should be up by Dec. 6th.

Ethnic Studies painting (I've reworked it.)

Unusual Voyage

Second, Vox Urbana will play our final show for 2011! We'll be providing the live music for the Southside Worker Center benefit. The guest speaker for the night will be Kim Bobo, author of Wage Theft in America. Poca Cosa will cater the food for the night.

So Friday, Dec. 2nd, head over to First Christian Church @ 740 E Speedway Blvd. The night starts at 6:30pm, and we expect to play around 8pm. There is a $10-15 suggested donation, though no one will be turned away.

It should be a great event! I hope to see you there!

And I hope you like my fun little design below. :)

Vox Urbana playing Southside Worker Center Benefit

And that's it for now! Next up- face paint update! I'll share photos from All Souls Procession and announce my next gig. Very very soon.

Sending lots of love!

Vox Urbana at Procession After-Party

2011-11-05T22:36:00.000-07:00

Quick announcement for now.

Vox Urbana will play at an All Soul's Procession After Party at the Boxing Gym in Barrio Anita.

$5 for three bands, and you support Tucson's Infoshop now celebrating six years of non-business! (And on a personal note, I actively give and take from the Free Store there- you should get involved.)

It's THE place to be. It's going to be a fabulous night of dancing calaveras!

:)

Vox Urbana and LoCura at Solar Culture Sept 2nd

2011-08-09T17:06:00.000-07:00

I won't actually be here for this show (sad face), but I did make y'all a grand flier for it! :)

LoCura- Mestizo music from San Francisco
Vox Urbana- Garage Cumbia from the heat of the Sonoran Desert

Friday September 2nd
8pm, $7
Solar Culture
31 E Toole
520 884 0874

Ethnic Studies Benefit 7/30/2011

2011-08-06T16:40:00.000-07:00

I just quickly wanted to share this piece. I live painted at Dry River for a great hip/hop and punk show to benefit the struggle to keep Ethnic Studies alive and well in Tucson. It's a 12" x 36" canvas that started completely blank when I walked in and looked like this 2.5 hours later.

If no one wants it as is, I will probably go back and work on it some more...

Hope you're all well. Today is the first Saturday of the month, which in Tucson means that galleries and studios are open, which means I'll be out tonight looking for free wine and grapes and brie. Yum.

xoxo

Ignite Tucson- Aug 1

2011-08-03T17:28:00.000-07:00

I wasn't completely convinced that I would do another Ignite performance, but in the end, how could I say no? I've had this idea in my brain just sitting there... and of course as soon as I decide that I'm going to do a performance no matter what, that's when the ideas began to gel. They begin to take on a real form. All I have to do is pick it out of my head, and it'll instantly manifest itself in this reality.

Anyway, at the request of one of the attendees that night, I am providing a transcript of the work.

But first, let me set the stage for you who did not witness the show. I was supposed to have 20 slides projected behind me, but since I'm a little bit of a nincompoop at times, my attempt at saving 20 slides in a 5 minute iMovie format completely failed, leaving me with a totally worthless disc. So at Dinnerware when we discovered that I messed up my slideshow, the new question was whether or not I would continue with the performance.

After looking at the projector and contemplating its own light, I decided to go for it. I found a couple stools that I could use as a(n) (unsteady) table that would lift my body directly into the projected light. After the stage was arranged, I got onto the mic, explained the funny circumstances and how I'm sort of winging it, and proceeded by removing my shoes, socks, and the black jacket/dress that I had often used when I was modeling for figure drawing classes. Underneath I wore a slip and a sheer undershirt.

I got a volunteer from the audience to shout out whenever a minute had passed.

Then I got onto the stools and did my first gesture pose. After every minute, I changed my pose.

This was what I recited during that time:

I remember.

That my first figure drawing class was not actually a class about the figure; it was a class about drawing, one of the foundation classes at the University of Arizona. The models tended to be overweight men,which sort of horrified my naive, sexually immature self but appeased my belief that we are all worthy of being looked at and even admired.

I remember.

There has always been a sense of the erotic in figure drawing. I do not claim stupidly that I can remove my vision from erotic experience. When I sat in my first actual figure drawing class, I was not necessarily aroused by the nudes, but I was intrigued by the way the light hugged this curve on the shoulder or the way the shadow rested comfortably in that nook in the elbow. I was happily lost in the form of the veins, the fullness of the thigh, the exquisite arch of the foot.

And the model was there for hours.

And for hours they let my eyes roam and explore their bodies in a way I believe most Lovers neglect to do.

I remember.

Living in LA. It was a late night in a funky place called the Gemini Manor. I had just gotten into figure drawing again after years of creative wandering, so to speak. Many rooms, multiple models, costumes, wine, a DJ. Dozens and dozens of artists- from students to professionals; from pencils to watercolors to laptops with tablets. The models were beautiful. Women who were dancers. Men who look like Spartans. At 2am, when the adventure was over, I gathered all my papers and pastels and my backpack. During my round of goodbyes, the ultra-Spartan model said, "Soooo.... do you want to continue figure drawing at your place?" I was shocked. Was this model/artist code for booty call?

As intriguing as the offer was, I refused. I hopped onto my bike and rode home through that cold, Los Angeles night.

I remember.

Georgia O Keefe was a beautiful woman. Lean, elegant face and body, powerful eyes and a great talent. I read once that she had been asked to model for an art class. I don't remember if she tried it or not, but I know that she did say that preferred to be the artist doing the drawing. A very wonderful and strong statement at a time when women were expected to be artists' muses instead of artists themselves.

But for me, I had never possessed a self concept of my beauty the way I think Georgia did.

So when I modeled for an art class for the first time, the reasons were many.

1) to make some money

2) to do something that once upon a time I would have been afraid to do

3) to experience the other side of the artist/model relationship

4) to believe that I am worthy of being looked at and even admired

Why does the figure draw me so? Why is figure drawing the one activity that I could do everyday for the rest of my life and never feel that I have wasted a single day? What is it about seeing him or her or you?

Am I drawn to the pure art of the human form? The light, shadows, hues, gradations? Am I drawn to the unique history that put that kink in your back, the bags under your eyes, that scar near your heart? Am I drawn to your vulnerability and also to my own? Because I am aware that I am exposing myself in this obsessive drawing as much as you are exposed.

A toast. A toast to our collective nakedness.

The audience responded well. I felt their warmth. I felt good about the performance. I processed it for awhile afterward- how to make it better if I repeat it, asking friends if such and such worked or not, etc.

I hope to get photos soon.

In the meantime I still need to collect thoughts about Eat Dinner: Fund an Artist and the Vox Urbana show at MOCA.

I will write more soon. But the sun is starting to go down, and I think I need to take a nice walk outside.

xoxo

Vox Urbana Goodness!

2011-07-22T18:42:00.000-07:00

***Photos added- see end of post***

This is going to be quick. I have a lot to do these days. There's a gig tomorrow, and I need to practice tonight. But before that, I need to take care of some basic stuff... like putting food in my mouth so I can continue to be alive and other things of that nature.

:)

I'm including two things from the Tucson Weekly. First is a review of the event/our gig last night at Dinnerware Art Space. Poptail Hour was fantastic, and so agrees the reviewer from the Weekly.

And second, a copy of the bit the Weekly wrote about us for the print edition of the paper. It's about Vox Urbana en la Playa- we'll be playing at the Museum of Contemporary Art on Saturday July 23rd. It's going to be one big beach party! Come in swim wear, bring towels, beach balls- have a great time!

Hope to see you Saturday (tomorrow!).

xoxo

***These I'm adding now because they're awesome. From the Poptail Hour show.***

Setting up

Vox Urbana!

Magic Nick and his guitar

El KIkis!

Amy's all good!

Old Times

2011-07-17T22:53:00.000-07:00

Here's a link to work I did at the Hive. All through the lens of Alex Schaefer. From 2008. Whoa!

Vox Urbana Poster

2011-07-17T22:19:00.000-07:00

Here's my latest flier for Vox Urbana. The painting is acrylic on wood and is currently called "Harrison the Conquistador with Ice Cream" until I can find a better name. Could there be one? Maybe tagging "in a Sears Photo Shoot" at the end? Nah. Figure a title with too many words will eliminate the need of the image.

Hope you like. :) And if you're in Tucson, hope to see you at one or both of these events.

xoxo

Vox Urbana gigs next week!

2011-07-15T15:14:00.000-07:00

Ok. So I just finished writing this thing out for the Vox Urbana blog and am too lazy to tailor it for my blog. So here's the post copied and pasted. All I can say is that I'm very excited about both gigs.

I hope to see you at both if you're in Tucson.

xoxo

We have two gigs next week- both at art spaces!
This could be heavenly!

Here are the details for the shows.
Hope to see you at both of them!

********
Thursday, July 21st, 8pm
Dinnerware Art Space, 119 E Toole in downtown Tucson

POPTAIL HOUR

Your favorite cocktails in popsicle form at $3 a pop! Hands on silk screening and monotype demonstrations. There WILL be a Vox Urbana screen- bring a shirt, a bag, an apron, whatever you'd like to use to promote your favorite local garage cumbia band! Vox Urbana will start at 8pm.

*******
Saturday, July 23rd, 8pm
MOCA, 265 S Church Ave. in downtown Tucson

VOX URBANA en la PLAYA

DUST's La Playa installation is an indoor urban beach meant to transform our interaction with the gallery and also meant to celebrate Tucson's summer. Vox Urbana will play en La Playa to add another facet of understanding of what the space can be and also to lend a distinctively festive atmosphere for the night.

Basically this means- who says you can't have a beach party in the Museum of Contemporary Art? :)

We start at ~~8pm~~ 9pm. $8 for non members, $5 for members.

Seppuku

2011-07-15T11:58:00.000-07:00

Randomly reading about seppuku. Which led me to Wikipedia. Which led me to this, a death poem.

I am moved to know that I am reading someone's last piece of art (but I think Mishima would say seppuku is art, and perhaps a greater art than the poem).

Like many samurai who committed seppuku in the face of shameful defeat, Ujimasa composed a death poem:

Autumn wind of eve

Blow away the clouds that mass

O'er the moon's pure light.

And the mists that cloud our mind

Do thou sweep away as well.

(雨雲のおほへる月も胸の霧もはらひにけりな秋の夕風)

Now we disappear

Well, what must we think of it?

From the sky we came

Now we may go back again

That's at least one point of view.

(我が身今　消ゆとやいかに　思ふべき　空より来たり　空へ帰れば)

(吹きとふく風な恨みそ花の春紅葉も残る秋あらばこそ)

Upcoming in Tucson

2011-07-07T18:35:00.000-07:00

I've been back three days, and things are moving!

MUSIC

Vox Urbana has been practicing like crazy to get me up to speed after my long absence, but also because we have a show this Sunday July 10th at El Casino Ballroom located at 437 E 26th St. The Pachanga starts at 3pm, and we're playing at 6pm. It should be a very interesting show because Kiri, our singer, is still in Mexico. And we'll be introducing Nick Quiller, our fantastic new guitarist.

If interested in the show, you'll need to buy a ticket- $5. All ages, family friendly. Besides our garage cumbia, you can also expect food, mariachi, folklorico and circus arts.

Oh, and did I mention that the funds raised at this event will go to the Protection Network for legal defense and support for community members at risk of detention, and to a campaign to end private prisons?

So get your ticket. Email nomoreborders@gmail.com and let them know that you want in on the fiesta!

We will also be performing on Saturday July 23rd at MOCA in downtown Tucson. Show starts at 8pm. I just checked out the MOCA page and saw us listed on their main page and totally did a double-take. I'm super excited about this gig. Art and Vox Urbana. Can we say "heaven"? :)

ART

I still have yet to share the aftermath of Eat Dinner: Fund an Artist. Soon, with flash drive in hand, I will hunt down the man with the photos, but until then, I have other great things to share.

First, a couple visuals, shall we?

This is Buster the Cat, one of the feline friends I had to carefully watch over during my housesit.

And this is an illustration I did for LA RECORD of Reggie Watts. Not sure if it will be used, though.

I have other larger pieces in the works but would like to finish them before I play show and tell.

But there have been some really great developments in the last couple months. I have been working with the Pima County Public Library and will be presenting face painting workshops at various branches this year. As they start booking me, I'll keep you informed. I'm very excited to extend my career in this direction and share my work with an interested public. And I am happy to be a part of the library system. Libraries are wonderful havens of information, a place to escape or to actively mine for nuggets of valuable data. I know many people, including myself, who find solace among the aisles of books.

PERSONAL

Had a great last couple days in Sierra Madre. Tom and Jimmy came out to say hello and show a lady a good time. They're such fantastic friends. Here are a couple photos.

In my painting gear with Jimmy

Tom being beautiful

And I've been reading Anais Nin. This is why I love her:

He turned his eyes fully upon her, now a glacial blue; they were impersonal and seemed to gaze beyond her at all women who had dissolved into one, but who might, at any moment again become dissolved into all. This was the gaze Sabina had always encountered in Don Juan, everywhere, it was the gaze she mistrusted. It was the alchemy of desire fixing itself upon the incarnation of all women into Sabina for a moment but as easily by a second process able to alchemize Sabina into many others.

Nin is amazing in her observations. She deals on the level below the skin, though she often deals with skin as well.

Does this make sense?

I hear the thunder outside. The monsoons are here, and it's the most beautiful sensation. When I walk down the street in this weather, I feel like a super hero. Storm must be my element.

xoxo

The Story of Venice Beach- 1 July 2011

2011-07-02T14:24:00.000-07:00

This trip's rhythm was set to our constant pee breaks.

Lots of water consumption this day from both of us. Both of us = my sister and yours truly.

I picked her up late morning, and we took the scenic route down Wilshire Blvd to Santa Monica Beach and then south to Venice. I love watching Wilshire transform. If I could take it from downtown, I would see it pass through businesses, through McArthur Park, pass the neighborhood I lived in for some four years, then through Koreatown, pass Miracle Mile (I have good memories of LACMA), then to posh Beverly Hills life (which both attracts and repulses me...), through Westwood. Then at this point, the ocean seems touchable. It'll still be awhile before you see it, can smell it, but passing Westwood, the weather cools. A sign of something different waiting for me soon.

Pit stop- Vons.

South on Lincoln. To Venice where we circled and circled looking for parking. I attempted to parallel park in one spot but aborted mission when I realized it was too small and/or I lack skills (did I ever mention that I'm half-Korean? My excuse.). We eventually did park on Andalusia.

Pit stop- Venice beach public bathroom, where a woman told me how much she liked my butterfly tattoos and her daughter said, "I like your gloves." My gloves- cheap, deep pink with fingertips cut off. The glove compliment meant more to me, I think.

(Here I am with aforementioned pink gloves)

Then we went to a coffee shop where sister got an amazing chai latte and I just drank my usual mix of decaf and regular dark roast. We walked across the busy lane of people strolling up and down alongside the funky street vendors to a small grassy spot right next to the bike path. From there, the beach and ocean felt powerful, inviting. I stood there just looking at it. Sister said, "We can walk to the beach." I stared at the blue horizon. "No. I just want to see it from here for right now."

And eventually I did sit down. I ate cherries and finished my coffee, delicious with nutmeg and cinnamon. Sister ate almonds and finished her chai.

Pit stop- Venice beach public bathroom.

Let me just say right here- my sister is smart. As I started walking on the sandy beach, she stopped me and said, "It's going to be hot. Wear socks. It really works." Such a wonderful, practical piece of information. And she's right. We casually trekked to the ocean as others skipped uncomfortably murmuring, "Ow ow ow. That's hot."

When we found our little site on the populated but not crowded beach, sister immediately took out her towel and prepared for sunbathing (which many people were doing around us, too. A beach of beautiful bodies.). I looked at the ocean and knew that I was going to immerse myself in its cool waters, swim out just beyond the point where the waves break. I was going to let myself play, toss and tumble and do nothing but float with the intention that the ocean will know how to heal me, fix me, if she felt so inclined.

And memories came flooding back to me. Memories of being in Mexico, of our trips to the beach where we would spend two or three days lounging around the ocean. Klc in his snorkeling gear. The nieces and nephews laughing as the waves rolled in, and the adults laughing but watching cautiously each new surge of water. Beer marinated carne asada. Random hiking. The unicycle. My wonderful mother-in-law the hawk that observes all, who senses the whole picture better than anyone.

And memories of Hawaii, of Makua in particular. I see Varo's keys falling to the ocean bottom, my signaling him to them. I see him disappear as I tread water, and as his head splashes through the surface, my asking anxiously, "Si las encontraste?" and him smiling in the affirmative.

The effect is profound- to access to these memories in a way that I have not experienced in a very long time. Even now I feel myself falling back into that space, this undefined space of my past and how it feels elastic, how I can shape it without losing the essence of it. I can re-sense the experience somehow- not as sensing again but rather, sensing in a new way.

Having access to these memories and to these feelings is bittersweet. But I would rather have them than not have them.

Even when I returned to the beach and considered becoming another sun bather, I knew that I had to go back to the ocean. I had to go there and reconnect.

I am grateful that I did.

Pit stop- Ocean (ha!)

When we were done with our respective activities, we gathered our belongings and walked down the beach a little. We took silly photos and a really ridiculous video. And we both laughed to tears during the entire process.

Pit stop- Venice Beach public restroom.

We joined the people meandering by the street vendors. I found the guy who sells sage and bought a bunch from him.

Then to the car. To Santa Monica. To Main Street. Coffee.

Pit stop- Coffee shop.

We took the scenic route back, but this time via Venice Blvd. I had forgotten about Culver City. Next time I'm in town, I think I'll take my sister there.

Home.

Sister took this picture of me. This is me, fresh from swimming in water and memories. I kind of want to hop back into the photo.

xoxo

Sierra a tu Madre

2011-06-30T17:45:00.000-07:00

How is it possible to be tired at 5:45pm?

Oh right. Annabelle's ceaseless meowing at 4am. Now I remember.

These last few days have been very quiet. Just me, just words, just drawings, just walks in the mornings and in the evenings. An occasional dramatic dance to a song that strikes my fancy.

I am thinking about words more and more. I am thinking about how to take them, mix them, smear them, build them to make new landscapes steeped in the melancholy and obsession that I cannot seem to put into paintings.

Stories about the smirk on the face that I can barely discern in this nocturnal existence. When I am in this existence.

****

I am getting ready for my trip back to Tucson, too. One more trip to the beach. One more visit with friends. One more moment of silence to refocus.

And then Tucson- back into projects. Vox Urbana. Parties. Art. Comics.

It's all about maintaining the focus. Keep the fire burning hot but controlled.

No distractions.

The Story of Santa Monica

2011-06-27T13:56:00.000-07:00

I imagine you.

There is nothing else right now in this moment. The presence of you in my mind's eye, in my body's memory, obliterates any other sensation- my thoughts about where the painting should go, my thirst and hunger, the uncomfortable heat of this late afternoon. These are now inconsequential.

May I walk to your beach and touch the icy water of your experience and memories? I taste the salt as I anoint myself with ocean water, and I thank the element for creating you. There are boats scattered beyond my reach, and I wonder how I can get there as the tide rises. The crash of the waves settle into my soul. The chill climbs higher and higher up my legs.

I have read stories about what happens there over the horizon, so deceivingly calm at this distance.

May I see what is over there? Will you take me over there?

A breeze refreshes my thoughts, but it carries no answer. No words.

So I step back from the lapping water to the sandy beach, and I sit. Head resting on my knees curled into my chest, I look out as the boats slowly travel lines parallel to the horizon.

I wait at the end of a ray of the setting sun.

I wait for my invitation.

Valediction by Charles W Pratt

2011-06-24T10:32:00.000-07:00

Now the bumbling bees that hover
Over loveliness in flower
Important with their store of pollen
Have had their hour;

Time has come for you to shed your
Silken petals and declare
Whether you are apple, cherry,
Plum or pear,

And all summer take your pleasure
Nourishing the ripening fruit
With the sun and rain you welcome
Through leaf, through root.

Another cloudy morning

2011-06-23T07:31:00.000-07:00

I am up early for a walk this morning.

As I walked up to the start of the Mt. Wilson trail (I didn't actually go up today), I picked up purple flowers fallen from the trees that line this street. I am fascinated by its color, want to use it in the painting I've been working on while here.

But the real goal- the apricot tree by a house just a street down from the base of the trail.

I remember it from my last trip up Mt. Wilson (a couple posts below).

When I came to its welcoming green and yellow presence, I smiled, examined the already fallen apricots and gathered quite a few that actually looked good. Luck would have it that I have found my breakfast this morning!

And as I continued walking, I found a huge yellow hibiscus bloom.

I put in the tie that holds my braid together, so it was low hanging in my hair, bloom looking upward like it would on the bush.

And I finally found a rose that smelled worthy of its name. Yes, I have been searching.

So on this last stretch of the walk home, apricots in my pocket, purple flowers in my other pocket, hibiscus bloom whispering sweet poems into my ear- I realized how much nature loves me and how much I love it.

Beautiful morning.

Food For Thought

2011-06-22T21:25:00.000-07:00

I relate to this idea of the "word bomb." I catch myself using wrong words, switching up my grammar all the time. And sometimes I just pretend that I didn't notice and continue talking even though internally I'm a bit mortified by my mistake.

From The Writer's Almanac (Solstice edition):

It's the birthday of novelist Ian McEwan (books by this author), born in Aldershot, England (1948). His father served in the army, so the boy grew up all over the world, including Singapore, Germany, and Libya. His father was a working-class Scot who had worked his way up to an officer's rank in the army. He drank too much, and Ian and his mother were both frightened of him. His mother was constantly anxious about trying to fit in with the other officers' wives, who spoke polished English with upper-class accents. McEwan said: "I don't write like my mother, but for many years I spoke like her, and her particular, timorous relationship with language has shaped my own. There are people who move confidently within their own horizons of speech; whether it is cockney, estuary, RP or valley girl, they stride with the unselfconscious ease of a landowner on his own turf. My mother, Rose, was never like that. She never owned the language she spoke. Her displacement within the intricacies of English class, and the uncertainty that went with it, taught her to regard language as something that might go off in her face, like a letter bomb. A word bomb. I've inherited her wariness, or more accurately, I learnt it as a child. I used to think I would have to spend a lifetime shaking it off. Now I know that's impossible, and unnecessary, and that you have to work with what you've got."

From Sierra Madre, base of Mt. Wilson

2011-06-20T14:25:00.000-07:00

Every morning is cloudy.

This morning I decided to spend about an hour and hike Mt. Wilson as far as I could in that time limit. Thanks to Joe's cats that operate even better than alarm clocks, I was up at 6:30am. Out the door by 7am.

And like all the mornings before, this morning was also cloudy and perfect. Up the street a few blocks (eyeing the "free" pile even though I already know I don't need anything from there), past the park, up another "not a through" road and then the dirt path that passes behind those amazing well groomed, white suburban (though not cookie cutter) homes that I only seem to associate with LA. As soon as you're on the dirt path, the world changes. I was transported to a non-tropical version of Palolo Valley in Hawai'i. Green, flowers, birds and if you take the time to really look, swimming pools and flashy cars in backyards.

The path itself is deceiving when you start. The trail is wide, and I had the distinct feeling that I would be surrounded by hills, that my hike would seem to enclose me. However, a few feet after this feeling, I found myself on a narrower path that wraps itself around the mountain so that I felt very exposed to the view (first of suburbia, then of a solid dam), to the air, to the fact that there was very little to catch me if I should slip. Not quite a fly on the wall, but not too far off.

And the higher I went, the foggier it became. Soon the view was gone. It was just me, this trail ahead of me, the mist in the air. Of course I thought of of every fantasy novel I had ever read, I thought of San Francisco and Arcata, I thought of how amazing this experience was and how the height was really starting to scare me.

My fear of heights is not consistent. I've scrambled up waterfalls just fine, parasailed in Mazatlan without issue. I have climbed many a tree and insist on examining rooftops. However, I remember being in Squamish on the top of this hill with the distinct need to hug the rock below me. I remember freaking out on a narrow, steep path to a waterfall and could only pass by focusing on the place where the path met the wall of rock to my right. And I remember crying when I walked on top of a small dam that many a drunk Mexican crossed without incident.

And I felt fear again as I watched birds hop out of my way, give me a daring look and then glide into the mist veiled air as I was approaching. Oh, how envious I am of their wings, and oh, how scared I was of the fall. And I remembered a good friend telling me that she's afraid she'd jump not so much that she wants to die but because she might be overcome by the idea that she, too, can fly.

Another turn around the mountain. The distinct sound of water. I paused at a sufficiently spacious part of the path preferably with a large bush between me and the edge. Looking down I saw a small waterfall and wondered where the rest of the waterfall was. Could I do it? Could I find it?

At this point I started to worry about my balance. This usually is never an issue, but I have had a few moments in my life when I have lost control of this sense. Once I was studying for my finals probably in my junior year at the university. It was late late night. My roommate was already in bed. I sat at the dining room table and decided to move to the sofa maybe some five feet away in the living room. I picked up my glass, my books and stood up... only to fall down. My vision went black, I heard the glass thump on the ground (it didn't break, or at least that is what I think I remember now), I heard my roommate run out to check on me.

The second time I was visiting Sierra Vista and became horribly ill. My fever was extremely high, and I slept on the living room couch with all the blankets I could find on me. My sleep was scattered and disturbed by bursts of feeling too hot, too cold. I would sweat profusely. I felt like shit. Then, at what I consider the climax of my sickness, I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, and a few steps into walking toward the bathroom, I realized that I couldn't do it standing. So I got onto my hands and knees and crawled my way over on the cold, green-gray tiles, crying, feeling that I had absolutely no control over my body now. And to just emphasize that point, I couldn't even hold it until I made it to the bathroom- literally, my body was incapable of handling basic bodily functions.

The last time I felt my balance escape me was not nearly as dramatic as the second time. I was doing yoga in a living room in Bisbee. As I got into the triangle position and turned my head to look at the ceiling, the room began to spin. I stopped immediately and waited a few minutes. Then I tried it again, and the room began to spin again. This time the effect was almost cool, except I knew it meant something was probably wrong with me.

So now I pay attention when my body starts to feel even slightly unsure of itself, like it was doing at that moment on the trail. And though I really to like to challenge myself, face my fears (every Vox Urbana gig falls in this category), etc, I thought it better to try it with a handful of trail mix the next time around.

About face. And in a motion that would have been ridiculous to any onlooker, I carefully placed both hands against the mountain and on the path as I adjusted to this new perspective of turning around, of walking down, of seeing a higher ratio of empty mist space to mountain land mass. Why, for fuck's sake, could I not focus only on the point of where the path meets my mountain support on my right? Why was I gifted with peripheral vision?

And the more I continued in this mental space- it soon went from complaining about my specific mountain hike predicament to a slew of issues involving my personal life- the less I "saw" the height.

The rest of the walk down was easy and uneventful.

*********

I've had a lot of time to read and paint and draw since I've been here. Time to write in my journal.

Here is a bit of Roberto Bolano. Just a little little bit that caught my attention:

Days before, at the motel, I had asked myself, What color is the desert at night? A stupid rhetorical question, yet somehow I felt it held the key to my future, or perhaps not so much my future as my capacity for suffering.

Yeah. Now that's good writing.

Watched a French movie about the love affair between George Sand and Alfred de Musset. I don't necessarily want the crazy drama, but oh, I do crave that sense of passion.

There's more to be shared, there is. Just not tonight.

xoxo

Eat Dinner, Fund an Artist

2011-06-09T22:01:00.000-07:00

So Friday June 10th is the big night. Doors open at 6pm. I will be presenting this night for a chance to win $500 to support my art. I will give a five minute presentation and let me tell you, it's like nothing you've seen before. Or maybe you've seen a lot of things. Who am I to say? :)

Please come out and support me. Vote for me and help me achieve my art dreams.

Below you'll find all the details of the event, including the delicious menu. :)

xoxo

Treat yourselves to a dinner this Friday, June 10th, 7pm, and award a $500 grant to an artist.

That's what EAT DINNER. FUND AN ARTIST is all about.

You are invited to attend this fun event.

Cuisine provided by the fantastic innovators at Monsoon Kitchen.
The evening's menu:

First course: Chilled Cantaloupe sipping soup with Port wine ice cube & Mint

Salad: Green salad with Sundried tomato-Artichoke vinaigrette and Crispy baked feta

Main dish: Choice of Chicken Golabki or Vegetarian Mushroom Golabki, both with olives, raisins, a white white tomato reduction, and a kale-parmesan crisp

Side dish: Morrocan Summer Vegetable Stew with Saffron and Preserved Lemon, with cilantro tzatziki, over Cumin and lemon-scented bulgar

Dessert: Homemade Horchata ice cream sandwiches

Does this sound amazing or what?

Dinnerware Artspace, 119 E. Toole, Tucson, Az, Friday, June 10th, 7pm is the place to be for great conversation, great food by Monsoon Kitchen, AND you get to choose an artist that will get $500. Doors open at 6pm.

Entrance Fee: $15/person but you will receive a big happy smile if you do $20/person. Each person receives a token for one drink. Beer, wine, water, other light drinks will be available.

Doors open at 6pm. Time to drink, mingle with the artists who will be presenting themselves that evening.

At 7pm, your dinner will be served.
At 7:05, individual artists will begin their 5 minute presentations to you in the hope that you will vote for them later to receive $500.

After the last artist makes their presentation (approx 12 total), we will take a break with fabulous music by Maya Caballero.
Speak with the artists off stage during the intermission.
You will vote by ballot.
Get your dessert.

Then the winner will be announced, and the artist will be presented with a check for $500.

You've done your community service!
You've helped an artist, and you've helped Dinnerware, and we all had a great time doing it!

Your RSVP will help us get your delicious dinner together pronto.

This is a first in a series of artist grant events at Dinnerware Artspace.

Presenting Artists:
(Incomplete List. Subject to change. And not in Order)

Amy Hagemeier
Derek Loewy
Patrick McArdle
Ashley White
Peg Wilmore
Rosanna Salonia
Leah Rothschild
Omer Kreso
Ruth Hillman
Dianna Taylor

Questions: dinnerwareartspace@gmail.com

Dinnerware is a nonprofit 501c3 corporation that survives and thrives on a donation basis and is always looking for innovation to bring to the Tucson community.

Ignite Tucson- the result...

2011-06-04T12:03:00.001-07:00

Ignite Tucson- Dinnerware Artspace 3 June 2011

Oh, I had great fun! Performance is always like jumping off the high dive for the first time. I become ultra aware of the task ahead of me and sometimes appear very detached. Deep breaths, a glass of wine, some focus.

And the following video is what's documented. Sound is good, image not so much. But it is something.

I only wish that there was video of me as I was going on stage. From the moment they called me up, I was in character- a clumsy librarian, smartly dressed, and maybe too much so as I sort of stumbled with my high heels and huge book. You could hear me quip, "I'm a librarian. I don't do heels. I do Dewey Decimal." And I flipped back and forth in this huge book until I found my place. Then I adjusted my glasses.

And then this happened:

Also, the slides are barely visible. Maybe I will find a way to add the audio to the the powerpoint presentation so you can have a better idea of the relationship between the images and the story.

And then of course I asked someone to take pictures of me, to document this librarian character of mine.

I have more fun in store for you soon. :) Well, fun for me, hopefully fun for you, too!

Thanks to everyone who went to Ignite Tucson at Dinnerware Artspace, who participated, who put it together. The gears in my brain are already turning for the next time...

xoxo

Ignite Tucson.

2011-06-03T11:35:00.000-07:00

I'll be presenting tonight at Ignite Tucson. Fifteen presenters give five minute presentations on whatever strikes their fancy.

Mine is a little whimsical piece called "Once Upon a Time, or A Girl and The Owl."

Details of event:

Ignite Tucson

Dinnerware Artspace

Toole Ave @ 7th Ave.

7-10pm

$10 sliding scale donation

I hope to see you there! I really do enjoy performance art.

xoxo

The Draw- for the love of Art!

2011-05-28T11:39:00.000-07:00

So this is monumental for me. I will be the hostess of a series of drawing workshops at Dinnerware Art Space. The idea that I will be free to share thoughts on art, to guide people to new discoveries, to play with the concept of "classroom"- FUN! :)

All info below. I hope to see you peeps there. We will learn a lot together.

xoxo

The Draw

Wednesday, June 1st, 6-7:30pm

$10 sliding scale

Dinnerware Artspace

119 E Toole

Join artist Amy Hagemeier as she leads an unusual array of drawing exercises.

This is a street level, nonacademic drawing group where any number of unusual or unexpected applications might appear. Be prepared to cross mediums into music and movement, to challenge ideas of observer and observed, to better understand your creative experience. Though there will be plenty of play, the focus will remain on the creative process of drawing on paper.

All levels welcome. No experience necessary.

Bring paper, drawing pencils and whatever else you are inspired to use. Then enjoy the ride.

This is the first in a series of The Draw. Future dates will be discussed at the first session.

Food for Thought

2011-05-25T10:27:00.000-07:00

"I will not give the happy ending. I think life is difficult and that's that. I am not at all — absolutely not at all — interested in the pursuit of happiness. I am not interested in the pursuit of positivity. I am interested in pursuing a truth, and the truth often seems to be not happiness but its opposite. Americans like to be funny, they like to laugh and they like a happy ending — which accounts I think for the sorry state of American writing life, but that's a whole other story." -

Jamaica Kincaid

Old Poetry Gold Mine part 3

2011-05-24T17:15:00.000-07:00

Some more goodies I discovered while rummaging through old sketchbooks and journals. Time for some love poems from an unspecified time in my life...

????

- The reality of it all-

Is that I dream of you at night as a disembodied head in my lap as I am sitting in a writing class. And you are out there, too, but instead of being a Mexican, you are a red head with freckles and you kiss me like we've been doing it forever.

-Maybe that's how I know your soul?-

????

When the wind blows through that broken screen, I think it sounds like your name whispered through the gaps of my teeth. And when the butterflies startle into the blue sky, I think it looks like those dreams I have of you all day long. And when the sun captures me in its net of rays, I think of that time at midnight when you lured me with your words, then your lips.

????

-And every time I blink I have a tiny dream-

And you are in that dream. And you are not in the next one.

????

Have you felt that color that I made you that night months ago? And when you saw me, did you crave it, to feel it again? When I find you, here inside me, I will keep you warm, not banish your devil like I should have then. I am not afraid of the pain you think you can cause. I am not afraid of the love you think that you give. I am power. I am strength. I am more than I thought. And so are you. And so are you. Which is why I do this.

Hare Dynasty- at Zoe Boutique

2011-05-21T01:04:00.000-07:00

The following paintings will be at Zoe Boutique (4th Ave/University a couple stores south of Epic Cafe) for the next couple of months. Opening reception is Saturday, May 21st from 6pm- ??. I'll be there a little after 8pm. I'm very excited about this show and hope to see you there!
xoxo

King Fluffy VI

As with most men in the Hare dynasty (his son being the exception), King Fluffy was pleasant, cute, gentle and, ultimately, ineffectual.

Queen Calico

With beauty often compared to the legendary Helen of Troy and daughter of powerful monarchs in a rival kingdom, it was instantly understood why King Fluffy would take her as his wife. But appearances can be deceiving. Behind her pleasant exterior was a clever and ambitious personality. And as Inanna did to Enki, she usurped King Fluffy's power in the most painless of ways, through his bed.

Prince Hair

It can be safely assumed that Queen Calico and King Fluffy enjoyed word games, and it has been recorded numerous times that the phrase "Prince Hair, heir of the Hare Kingdom" echoed endlessly in the halls of the palace. Also plagued with jokes about how he resembled offspring from the incompetent rat and pug duo a few kingdoms away, Hair grew up an insecure boy who turned to his power as the heir to fill the void caused by his lack of self esteem. This is the key psychological component of his life and can be used to understand the atrocities he would later commit as King.

Princess Prudence

Often revered as the savior of the dark age of the reign of King Hair, Prudence found great love from her kingdom during her ten years as Queen. Though at the time it was unknown, we have since discovered that King Hair's death was not so accidental afterall. Acting from both her sense of justice for the kingdom and a need to avenge years of abuses she suffered from her brother, Princess Prudence plotted her brother's demise since her childhood.

Princess Oona

The youngest and the most beautiful of the children, she left the kingdom to follow Laika, a traveling, canine bard with fantastic stories about living like a star in the sky. Princess Oona was the most famous of Laika's followers, who eventually created a commune somewhere in the west of present day France. She cut all communication with her family, refused to attend her sister's funeral and was later dismissed as a lunatic espousing the existence of time and space travel.

Ah, the personal...

2011-05-11T11:26:00.000-07:00

*from 5/10/2011*

It is a strange morning. You can never predict these kinds of mornings. My brain was very active last night and I spent a lot of time drawing and then reading (skimming, really) about Queen Elizabeth I (insert memory from high school of Amanda reading a big fat novel about her). Despite knowing that I would have to get up before 7am for a hike, I didn't get to sleep until nearly 2am, and I consoled myself by reminding myself that I've survived worse on far less sleep.

Of course, it is when you have already extended yourself about as far as you want that circumstances grab and extend you further, testing you, maybe even punishing you for not properly caring for yourself.

Either way, at 5am I woke up to an important text followed by my immediate phone call. (I cannot go into details but know that things are okay.) It was jarring news and despite only three hours of rest, I am awake. And I am sufficiently unnerved that I don't want to go back to sleep.

Now for the early morning hike, the idea of which, in theory, I adore, but in practice... yes, I need more practice.

Just writing as I wait for my ride.

***

Back from the hike up Tumamoc Hill (via the Sentinel Peak road) with Laurel. Really, just a wonderful walk, a much needed discussion, a sharing of space with someone with similar energy. Words between watching quail, cactus flowers and the scattering of adorable baby squirrels.

So much on our minds.

***

So I went on a road trip to Los Angeles at the end of April to face paint at the Wilshire Earth Day Celebration. My friend Laura and I made the trek out. Everything was fine (except maybe the desert heat) until we were right outside of Cabezon, some three hours from LA. I was driving when there was this horrific dragging sound. "Is that me?" I asked aloud, not really expecting an answer but more to acknowledge that I did know it was me. And we pulled over three lanes to the side of I-10.

This is what we found... well, after we took off the tire. Or, more accurately, after the other guys took off the tire (was it the patrolman, the good samaritan or the AAA man?).

Tire blowout outside of Cabezon, CA. No little jacks for the 94 Cadi. AAA had to bring out the big guns! (I just got my membership the night before the trip...)

The AAA man directed us to the only place I could buy a new tire at that time of night. And the man who ended up changing the tire for me, the moment he walked into the shop, he looked directly at me and asked me if that was my Cadi in the lot. I said yes. Then he valiantly tried to convince me to sell it to him. "Cash now I'll trade you my car and even get it a paint job It's fuel efficient." Such an interesting day with such unusual events, I didn't mind the tire blowout at all.

We stayed with a friend in Sierra Madre. I had never been there before, and though the town is a bit on the tame side, the mountains are beautiful and filled my little heart everyday I looked at them. I spent a lot of time walking through the neighborhood, looking at yards, people and squirrels.

Things I did in LA: Face painted with Mindy for Earth Day. Visited family. Partied with Tonya Kay. Picked up my stuff in storage. Caught up with friends while we watched Joe LoPiccolo play at the Nose Wine Bar. Had a lovely lunch with another friend who arrived the day we planned on leaving LA.

I almost didn't want to leave. There was something refreshing about this visit.

But I did leave.

***

Ok. The lack of sleep has finally caught up to me. I think I need to close my eyes just for a bit.

xoxo

Photos!!!

2011-05-10T17:49:00.000-07:00

ART!!! (continued)

I just wanted to share a few pics from the Dinnerware photo shoot. Fashion by La Fashionista Leon. Photography by Patrick McArdle. Make up and model is all me! :)

These photos were so much fun. It's a strange exercise in self love/trust to just throw yourself in front of a camera. Similar to throwing myself on stage. There's this feeling of "Well, now is it. You get one shot. Don't fuck it up."

So you just do.

It's a good exercise. And the product can be very amusing.

I am currently in the middle of another post that I've been writing on and off all day today. Hope to share that very soon.

xoxo

Update update update.

2011-05-04T00:24:00.000-07:00

So much to cover right now. Let me just go down the list I have:

Music!!!

First, Vox Urbana played the Rialto for Club Crawl on Saturday April 16th. I'll be honest. I've never been so nervous about performing. It's the biggest venue we've played both in terms of prestige and literal size of the place. It was a little shocking to get there and realize that the stage alone is as big as most venues we play. But in the end, we did it. We survived. Or, more accurately, I survived.

Then we went to Frida's party and rocked her garage! :) I take so much comfort performing for my friends, for familiar faces, for dancing lovelies. I joke that the Rialto gig was just a practice for her birthday party. And everyone danced! And good friends bantered with us. And it was a beautiful night!

Vox Urbana playing garage cumbia... in a garage!!!

The completely ridiculous accordion diva pic. Heh!

So quickly before I move onto the next topic. We will be playing two shows this week. They are:

Cinco de Mayo at O'Malley's (of all places! What happens when the Irish find another reason to get wasted? When they want to wear sombreros?). We'll be opening for Mostly Bears, a really solid band from Tucson. It'll be a fun night. Not sure of the cover, but it will be 21+. O'Malley's is at 247 N 4th Ave.

Then Saturday Vox Urbana will play at the Red Room. We'll be sharing the night with Balkan Spirit and Aztral Folk. Again, this should be a fantastic show- a great mix of gypsy and cumbia and all things awesome. Free show, all ages. The Red Room is in The Grill at 100 E Congress St. in downtown Tucson.

Art!!!!

So for Open Studio Tour in Tucson, I set up a small table at Dinnerware Artspace in downtown Tucson. I was given a wonderful tour of the place and began painting my face as a sort of quiet performance. Little did I know that La Fashionista, who has a shop inside Dinnerware, would like my make up and use me as a model for a photo shoot of her clothes. I know there are photos of me somewhere on the internet so I can share them with you... I just need to track them down. In the meantime, though, this gives you an idea of what was involved.

With dear friend Ale at Dinnerware Art Space. Post modeling gig.

I'll be showing works at Zoe Boutique on May 21st for the Honey Bunny show. The theme: all things cute. The aesthetics of adorable. Should be interesting to see what the artists do. I'm doing some fun, inventive stuff. More as it develops.

Yikes!!!

I want to share more things, but I also really really want to update the blog. So I'm posting these now and will continue to Face Paint!!! and Personal!!! in the next post.

More soon.

xoxo

Photos- 4th Ave Street Fair and Club Crawl flyer

2011-04-13T15:32:00.000-07:00

A quick post of pictures!

The Street Fair is probably my favorite event in Tucson for my little face paint booth. I do really well, and people are wonderfully friendly. And it's so close to where I live that I can commute via my bike. Granted it is a bit of a wobbly ride, but it sure beats revving up that massive Cadi just to go down the street a couple blocks. I try to save the old school cool for the road trips.

The Spring 4th Ave Street Fair of 2011. Here are the photos:

Day One:

Day Two:

Day Three:

And one other pic. Thanks to the people who love our music, we're playing at the Rialto (!!!) during Club Crawl. We've got the 10-10.45pm slot.

This is so awesome to me that I decided to whip out the painting I've been saving for an opportune moment to advertise. Yes, I'm stoked about the gigs. But there is a possibility that I am equally as stoked about making, painting, inventing new flyers for the band and hopefully bumping up the kind of aesthetic we find on the streets. Word.

The flyer for our spot at the Rialto for Club Crawl:

If you're in Tucson, come out and watch us perform. We've been playing with our set, and I'm excited to see the changes on stage.

xoxo

Today I had a beautiful morning- Tucson AZ

2011-04-08T18:10:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I had a beautiful night dancing to LoCura at Solar Culture. This morning I went with great friends into the mountains, and we hiked to delicate pre-monsoon waterfalls. In Tucson most of my hiking tends to be urban. I weave through businesses and fellow passerby-ers. So I was happy to see nature coincide with my Tucson existence.

And I just finished updating the Vox Urbana blog. All band members now have photos, there are now pages dedicated to just photos and just videos, and I just posted a big thank you to everyone who came to our shows this past weekend.

Speaking of the past weekend, I survived.

I just wanted to state that clearly, in its own line. It's a big deal.

The street fair went remarkably well, and with the extra bit I earned, I want to repair my little accordion. She's my traveling companion, and it would be nice if her bass buttons worked.

The three shows we played were also a lot of fun, though I did experience how important it is to be well rested for me as a performer. My poor fingers were weaker than usual, which meant the playing was not as smooth as it could have been.

But I don't think anyone really seemed to mind. Everyone was dancing! And that always makes me happy.

Not much this time in terms of art. I'm still working on Zoe pieces, and I've been spending a lot of time on the computer with photoshop for flyers and for updating all necessary social networking sites.

This next week I hope to get a lot of painting done.

Right now I need to cut my business flyers for tomorrow (I'm face painting at a fundraiser), but I wanted to leave you with a couple photos of me from Zuzi Theater when we were rehearsing with Safos. Check it:

My face was painted because we had the Balkumbia gig at Club Congress right after the rehearsal.

I do love these photos, though. Also, my favorite colors- blue and orange. They always draw me in.

I hope to update again soon. Lots of love!

Busy busy busy... Tucson, AZ

2011-03-30T01:00:00.000-07:00

Again, another month flies by without a word from me.

But there is so much to share right now. Where to start, where to start.

The Personal:

Oh yes, the loneliness is still there. Oh yes, the pain and hurt is with me. But things are on the upswing. Well, at least that is what I like to tell myself. I have dedicated an extraordinary amount of time to my painting and art. It is the thing that keeps me moving forward. Color tells the tale of my soul.

The Art:

I exhibited my art at the Vagina Monologues on Friday March 4th.

I have various pieces in the works. I finished the following about a week or so ago. Again, another portrait of the daughter of a friend. Meet Azul. She's one fun, amazing kid. She gave me my first violin lesson and plays in the school's Mariachi band. And on top of all of that, she's just beautiful.

Also working on pieces for the next show at Zoe Boutique. More about that when we're closer to the date.

Finally, just working on making some fun art for the band. Which leads me to...

The Music:

We have been busy! After the gig at the Grill in Feb, I went away for three weeks. The weekend after I got back, we had booked a gig for the Food Conspiracy CoOp member meeting. Then there were a couple weeks where we could focus on learning a couple new songs. Then Friday March 25th we played with Taraf de Tucson and DJ Dirtyverbs at the first Balkumbia at Club Congress. It was a fabulous show. The next day we performed with Avatara at Zuzi Theater with a dance production by Safos.

Here's my bio found in the booklet:

And here are videos from Balkumbia:

(Note how Vox Urbana has their faces painted.)

Now it's a week of trying to make a decent blog for the band, collecting all evidence of the band's existence and informing everyone of the THREE gigs we have this upcoming weekend.

They are:

FRIDAY APRIL 1st:

(we have two gigs!)

Gig #1:

Shloka and Lulu Present:

The Arming of the Dancers: a trapeze and dance production

8pm

with Amy D'itri

Emma Jeffries

Flight School Acrobatics

Talk 2 Strangers

Vox Urbana

C Cinco Warehouse C-5

657 W Saint Mary's Rd (@ I-10)

$3-5 donation

We play at 9pm, so be sure to get there early!

Gig #2:

The Red Room (the Grill) on Congress in downtown Tucson

There will be live music throughout the night, but we play at 11pm.

SATURDAY APRIL 2nd:

Gig #3:

Cumbia Party!!

Fundraiser for the Tucson Child Care Collective

8pm

The Boxing Gym (Barrio Anita)

1080 N Contzen Ave.

with

DJ Adan Atl (Qumbia Qrew- San Fransisco)

Voz Urbana (Cumbia- Tucson)

donations- all to benefit the collective

We'll play around 10:30.

It's a lot of stuff right now. And if that wasn't enough....

The Face Paint:

The next 4th Ave. Street Fair is the same weekend of the three gigs. Friday April 1st- Sunday April 3rd, you can find me out on 4th Ave. painting the faces from 9am-ish to 6pm. The event was a success last time, and I met many wonderful people. I hope you can come out and bring your kids! There will be great music, art, food, everything! A really great time for the entire family.

But what I also mean to say is that I will be extremely tired by the time Sunday evening comes around. I hope I don't work Monday morning....

And finally, I will be in Los Angeles to face paint at the Wilshire Center Earth Day celebration on April 22nd. You'll find me on that big lawn around Wilshire and Oxford from 6pm-8pm. I love this event so much and am honored to be doing it again this year.

So this is my update. Please forgive all the grammar mistakes. I didn't even read it over... no time.

Sending love!

Old Poetry Gold Mine part 2

2011-02-23T22:07:00.001-08:00

Boys and Girls- this can go on forever. And I just might let it.

#1.

DIRT IS BEAUTIFUL. Lesson #1. You must learn this either before or soon after you arrive to Nogales, Sonora. It is the 1st rule of survival.

#2.

Lengthy, slimy
From the depth of water and salt
Dingy, food
Hanging limply
From her fists
Like streamers
From handlebars.
She provided with the help of a white man.

Small, pink, female.
She stands alone with feet
Like cylinders
Cringing over pebbles
By the depth of water and salt.

What creatures may emerge
To eat up your pebbles
To eat up your food
To eat up small, pink, female.

#3.

It gets hard.

You have been in hibernation for some six years.
The cold never stops
Outside your fat and fur.
A flurry of snow
That whistles for your attention.
"Listen to me.
Let me tell you what you are."

Don't wake up until you're ready.
But I hope its soon.
Six years is a very long time
for the snow to be insinuating
what you are.

Stay curled. Into yourself.
I will bring you things you need.

Old Poetry Gold Mine. part 1

2011-02-23T16:50:00.000-08:00

That is exactly what I found while going through old sketchbooks and journals. Woot!
Which means I must share.
These are all from probably college years and before.

#1.

The house is small and firelike.
The ocean colored couch is like sleeping on aborted babies.
There should be a mist or haze to block me
from the hall of gold books
and from the dining room of eggshells.
On the table are photos of clocks
and women's vaginas. And Christmas cards with puppies.
The television is off and a baseball bat
has penetrated the now shattered screen.
(I see infinite rainbows raining on me and a thousand points of blood).
Gentle snoring follows an invisible musical meter
Silent banging a world away destroys my skull.
Silent banging like a puff of breath blowing out a lone candle.
Unsure, I sit on aborted babies.

#2.
Sit with me in the shade of this doorway
to cool off.
The heat of this town of stair-stilted homes
can be unbearable, and I see it
in the glitter of sweat that scatters
from his forehead.
A heavy lump of life collapses to the
ground, and he relaxes on his sheddings.

"I feel bad because I'm making you climb
uphill with your large bag and sort feet."
"I hadn't noticed until you mentioned it.

From the windowsill I slide to the ground.
He looks like the Sonoran Desert
but carries the scent of plumeria.

When we talk, we are naked, open highways
stretching across flatness to New Mexico.

We recreate ourselves: hypothetical people in
hypothetical situations.
"What would you do if you only had 5 days left?"
"If you could greyhound it, where would you be
going to now?"

The night before we climbed under the streets
when the streets were silent.
Our stars the glint of the pocket flashlight
on the rocks poxied to the grey wall.
Watching him crawl across these stars
like the spiders we found at the perpendicular
of wall and ceiling, I understood the
advantages of being short and of knowing
when to go underground.

At two in the morning, passing drivers
hollar in comprehensible sound strings.
We share a small joke about his hat.
We laugh.

#3.

a cacoon of arms
radiate from me
petting the sky, the ground
grabbing everything
with swift, sticky fingers
stickiness
rolling down my face
sugar water
a candied human
from my side, i see thousands of air pockets
frozen time
thousands of air pockets
each containing a hint of my breath
dead lava
from my side, i see concave, convex faces
greeting me with lips too big
with fish eyes
with pelvis sized cheekbones
from my side, i can say nothing.
thousands of air pockets catch my breath
sucking from them all the color and texture
leaving my naked voice a fluttering mess.

#4. (a small piece of paper containing the following words)

waka
the blink of spring
coral and fish
nibbling on me
sun burning my fingers
into my back

it is you

black pseudo-anguish is
real anguish

word-
over & over

#5.

I am sitting in the church of
overt vices. Here we throw it
out for all to see.

And I don't know how to
act. I am internal- ther color of
haze, the taste of sex
because my own obscurity
turns me on.

#6.

Blue saturates
That is the only nature of blue-
From the water to the sky
to the rooms to the woman
sitting
and saturated. -in blue-

Does it taste like an expanding balloon?
The source of the separating of pangea.

And the origin of
membrane
Of the bi lipid layer
Of alien mucus
Of the concentration of piqued stimulation

Tonight I sleep at the bottom of a pool.
Motionless, clung to by sea anemones
The waving of their tentacles initiating
a flurry of color changing
____

and there he touched me.
so rarely do we embrace that i can still feel
the heat of him hours later.
the meat of his thigh

22 Feb 2011- Guadalajara

2011-02-22T20:28:00.000-08:00

Pour from me. I am urging the words and the thoughts and the images to pour from me. I hope that if I can cause a trickle, that it will erode the wall that stands between me and my essence and soon the trickle will become a waterfall.

*Insert memories of looking at photos of the Victoria Falls when I was in elementary. Noting how wonderfully the word Zimbabwe plays off my lips. Commenting how one day I will go there.*

I am looking at the words. I am listening to the music. I am staring at the art. I wonder: are there parts of me that can only be accessed by song or only by poetry or only by color?

*My journal is full of musings about you. I don't know how you can still be the first thing I think about when I wake up, how you can be the last thing I think about when I close my eyes for bed. The memory of you is a perfume that I cannot wash from my clothes, that I cannot scrub from my skin. I can no longer look at amber without thinking about your eyes. My world is steeped in you. With that said, the banality of our interactions kills me.*

Just letting tidbits come forth. A channeling.

*He and she.

He and I, fruits from the same tree.

I knew him before she cut him down.

A moment in her hands,

he manifested in flesh by her side.

The gift.

I watch as he bites into himself.*

*-What are you doing?

-What do you mean?

-What are you doing here? Why can't you just stay and deal? Millions of people just deal, they learn to cope, they learn to make life work. Why do you insist on running to this place?

-This place. This place. This place- I thought I had love here. I am not concerned with what kind of love, only that it is pure. I thought I had it here and that is why I came. But I don't know about everything else. I don't know if I can deal. And I don't know if I believe in "coping". I have seen people drop all dreams because they must live a specific li(f)e, because we were all born into whatever economic class we're in. And there are intense social pressures to maintain it.

-What are you getting at?

-I have lived my life as freely as I can. I have stripped myself of the expectations of a "normal" life. I have made very conscious decisions to go WITHOUT commodities that people incorrectly think of as necessary. I've consciously avoided debt, avoided owning things that will anchor me to any place. My intention has always been to never clip my own wings.

I suppose I fear that "coping" means "clipping" and I cannot have that. I fight that in every part of me.

-What are your thoughts of this all coming from privilege? Your ability to separate yourself from any sort of responsibility or family or history is frivilous.

-You may be right. But I cannot see how, as someone who believes in profound change, that tying yourself to relationships that support the system you wish to change...I don't see how that is helpful. Not that I don't want to be supportive and responsible. But I want to redefine these relationships and what they can be. I want to create something new and put aside preconceived notions of what a relationship should be. A change in all relationships- our relationship to consumption, to nature, to each other.

A note about the conversation piece above, I used to write things like that all the time in middle/high school. Devil's advocate with oneself. But more than being about making complete logical sense, it was about flowing, about association and just seeing what the words would uncover on their own.

****

Friday 4 March 2011- Tucson, AZ

I'm back. I'm back. It's been 24 hours, and I've already drank and danced. I will repeat it again tonight. My present to myself for my birthday. :)

Looking at the accordion and knowing that I must merge with this instrument.

Knowing I have to head back to work soon.

The end of the little trip. The soul definitely feels better, though.

15 Feb 2011- Hollywood

2011-02-15T00:40:00.000-08:00

I don't know what to write. I want to write something, share something, but I don't know what it is.

Anything, Amy. Just write anything.

So here I go.

It feels like a long time since I walked these streets, though I know it's only been about five months. I have changed. I have changed a lot in those five months. And one thing I feel distinctly, I am walking these streets alone in a way I have not felt since I first started visiting in my university years.

I am aware of my loneliness- isolated little ping pong ball ricocheting from event to event.

I am not sad about my loneliness. Not completely, anyway. I am not afraid of my loneliness. I am experiencing it, understanding it, observing how I behave with it.

The thoughts: What are my patterns? What is my true face? Where do I fail? How can I improve? Will being alone help me align to whatever it is I must align to or will it make me neurotic? Will I become the crazy cat lady from the Simpsons?

But my time in LA is good. And despite feeling alone, I know that I am surrounded by people. Who of our peers doesn't suffer from the alienation effect? I do try, though, to realize how ridiculous it is to mope about not connecting when there are so many people around at all times. The point is not whether or not I can connect to others. The point right now is that I don't know if I even want to.

I want to experience alone.

Why?

Because I've tried to be open. I've tried with all my little heart to be open and big and absorb and give all the love in the world.

Why?

Because I am idealistic. Because I am naive. Because I don't know any better (but is there really a better way of knowing/being?).

And I got hurt. And I tried again. And I got hurt again. And I tried again... I'm ready to redirect my energy and effort elsewhere. I want to walk alone for a little bit. There are a few things I need to adjust for myself. Some training I must undergo, if you will.

I remember reading that one of Emma Goldman's lovers claimed that prison was the best university he had ever attended. This could mean several things, but I wonder about the isolation, the minimal, the routine. Despite the liberty to roam where I want, I feel trapped in patterns that I have not thoroughly explored. I think that being with myself, I can finally deal with my own reflection, look at that portrait hiding in the attic. No more distractions, just me vs me.

***

It's a cold day in LA. It's a day of tea. And for me, today is a day of walking.

I don't mind this kind of weather. It reminds me of San Francisco, and San Fran always puts a smile on my face.

More soon.

xoxo

Eye of the Storm

2011-02-09T11:51:00.000-08:00

February 6, 2011

Christmas through January was one hard journey. I went through some very dark places, felt like I was gifted the chance to look into one of my scarier, sadder parallel lives. I can now better appreciate the whimsical life I have created for myself.

But in retrospect, it's not just that said time period that has been difficult.

In all honesty, Tucson has not been the easiest stay for me. In many ways I feel like I have been living in extremes, not swinging from one to the other, but rather I've been living in the two extremes simultaneously. They are constantly with me, occupying different terrain in my life and causing a disconnect in me at times.

The disconnect from the moment. The disconnect between private/public self.

But here I am. I have survived something. I have learned a great deal in a short amount of time, and I am forever grateful for those who supported me.

So this is dedicated to the Phoenix.

The bird, not the city, silly.

*************************

First thought while looking at my blog- how is it that I put 2010 in only seven posts. Oh, the stories that one does not share. :)

**
I am preparing for a trip. Saying what I just said about Tucson, I know that I need to get out of town for a bit- like a brisk walk for my soul, to get the blood moving and to shake off the feeling of stagnation.

I am thinking about new paintings. I just saw some art yesterday, actually. There were new shows at Zoe Boutique and Epic Cafe, both on 4th Ave.

I am thinking about the band. Our name has changed yet again. We are now Vox Urbana. After our Oct. 23rd show, we dug a hole and hid for about three months. We emerged (finally!) at the Screening Room on January 28th (Happy Birthday to my lovely sister Esther!). Then Feb. 1st we played a last minute gig with Butterfly Turbulence Jones at the Red Room (the Grill) in downtown. Both shows were great, and they were also our first gigs with amazing vocalist/musician Kiri. Check out his music here.

**

February 7, 2011

From where I am right now, I see various positive, potential paths radiating from my present. I have several "master plans" in the works, and though in one instant I may seem to have a favored plan, I do not invest too much attachment to any of them. How can I describe it? I found the tree from which I want to eat; I am just waiting to see which fruit ripens first.

The moment that the correct path is revealed, I will travel down it with all the energy I have, with every intention of living it to the fullest.

**

There is art in the works. There is music in the works. But the only thing I will share right now is this. This is a portrait of my friend's daughter. Belated birthday present.

When she opened it, she did this amazing happy dance that was both sweet and remarkably hilarious.

Here she is being a good sport and posing in the silly picture I wanted to take. :)

**
February 9th, 2011

Last night was the board meeting for the Tucson Unified School District. Students and community came together on two issues, to support ethnic studies in Arizona and to support teachers at Rincon and Palo Verde who are all going to be fired in a "turnaround" model of changing the school. Read more here and here.

So as I said, we came together and as the meeting was going on indoors, there was also a celebration outdoors. Here is a photo from that night. The accordion army, if you will:

I am in love with the white and glittery red keyed accordion you see in the pic.

**
So with that all said and shared, I must get ready for work and for my trip and to comfort my bruised little soul.
A toast to the Phoenix!
xoxo

What? You mean I have to work?

2010-12-22T21:14:00.000-08:00

I wasn't sure if I was going to stay in Tucson. But it seemed like a good place to run out of money. And because of that, I've gone back to working again. Nothing like a little bit of Trader Joe's to liven the spirit, to polish this work ethic of mine.

Also, nothing like a little bit of Trader Joe's (or any job, for that matter) to take time away from my real life (I say this purposefully- my employment and my life are very different things). I haven't been playing the accordion as much since I started working, but that will change here soon as I figure out a way to maintain my unemployed lifestyle the best I can while employed. And I haven't painted nearly as much on my own time, but I have live painted on four separate occasions, which is the perfect way to balance social life with soul work, if you will. And I also discovered an inexpensive figure drawing workshop at the University of Arizona that I absolutely refuse to miss if I'm in town.

The economy of time.

So this is my big lesson for this next phase of my life.

But a quick list of updates:

MUSIC:

The band finally has a name. We're called Sonora Voz Urbana. We are:

Jesus "Kiki" Castellanos- percussion king and vocals
Joaquin Zamudio Garcia- bass king and vocals
Amy Hagemeier- accordion neophyte and vocals

I FINALLY have a recording of us from the Oct. 23rd gig we played at Solar Culture with Salvador Duran. One day I will sit down, figure out how to post it and will share it with all of you. Thanks to James the sound guy at Solar Culture for recording the show.

ART:

I've been doing a lot of live painting recently. These are the events I've hit up as of late (with photo of painting when available):

10/19/2010- Hip Hop Show, Dry River

11/4/2010- Butterfly Turbulence show, Dry River (I adore Butterfly Turbulence. Cochise County kids doing awesome things always need to be supported.)

11/14/2010- Parasol Project Presents: The Return of the Time Traveling Vaudevillians!, The Hut

11/27/2010- Hip Hop Show #8, Dry River

One of my favorite discoveries in the last month: figure drawing sessions at the University of Arizona every Tuesday in room 140 from 6:30-8:30pm. They'll be closing up shop for the winter and will start again the 2nd week of January. Here are a few of my recent drawings from the workshop.

FACE PAINT:

I participated in the 4th Avenue Street Fair Dec. 10-12 . I face painted non stop both Saturday and Sunday. When we were done in the early afternoon, my hair wrapping friend Shloka looked at me and said, "You're like a machine!" A machine that has to take a pee break. :)

Here are a few photos from the fair:

Also, I hit up the All Soul's Procession on Nov. 7th. These are excellent photos by Allison Mullally. To read more about that, check out my Face Paint Amy blog.

I think that's it for now. I need to make it a point to update the blog more often.

Sending lots of love.

xoxo

Tucson on Fire! In the good kind of way.

2010-10-04T22:03:00.000-07:00

Here's an update before I head to bed.

First, our cumbia band played Saturday night next door to Solar Culture here in Tucson. Not only was it our first gig as a band, it is my first accordion gig EVER. So I'm pretty stoked. In celebration, I'm adding a pic of me with my accordion when I was in Portland and a pic of me feeling the post show glow, baby! :)

Saturday Oct. 9th- I have art in the Border Opposition Action Fund Art Auction. This will be a great event with not just fantastic art, but also awesome performances by The Missing Parts (who I just saw a Plush) and The Fiestacles with Cozmo Brown. $5-$10 donation to get in (to benefit various O'odham groups), 6pm at the Boxing Gym, 1080 N Contzen.

Here's the piece I donated:

Saturday Oct. 16th- I'll be one of seven artists to participate in a group art show at Zoe's Boutique. Opening reception 6-9pm. 735 N 4th Ave. (just south of Epic Cafe). Other featured artist: Nina Axan, George Belcher, KoKo Bellows, Lisa Kanouse, Andrea Peterson, Lauren Russell.

Here's a sneak peek at the kind of work I'll have at the show. Very fun, cartoon-y stuff.

Saturday Oct. 23rd- The band (still nameless) will be playing our second gig ever at Solar Culture. You know you want to come and get your cumbia on! It's going to be fantastic.

So I think that's all I got for right now. And keep your eye on the open mics around town. I occasionally make my rounds. :)

xoxo

9/19/2010 Tucson, AZ

2010-09-20T02:17:00.000-07:00

9/19/2010- Tucson, AZ

Even though Kiki's place is an attic which, in Tucson, is as close as you can get to living in the sky, it's deceivingly difficult to gauge the hour and weather. And yes, there are windows here.

So I sit here at 4pm but with no real sense that it is 4pm other than the fact the clock on my computer says so.

And as of late, 4pm doesn't even mean that much to me. As I've been on the road an insane amount, time has lost some of its power over my life.

Since I last wrote, there have been so many things happening. First, I'm learning to play accordion so I can play in a band with dear friends Kiki and Joaquin. It's almost spiritual in that when I was in high school, I wanted to play in a band with my guitar, but my skills were so lame that it put a quick end to that dream. My pathetic attempts to jam back then are more than made up for now that I can actually maneuver this accordion. And the things that pour from it actually qualify as songs. Word.

Then at the end of the July, a few friends and I caravanned out to San Francisco. Let me describe this: five people, three cars and two cell phones between all of us. And as a caravan, we can only go as fast as the slowest, and the slowest was a truck with a uhaul averaging 40 mph. So I'm not really sure how we made it to San Francisco in two days, but we did.

Note that I am going 21 mph here:

After a too brief introduction to San Francisco (um, does anyone want to move there with me?), I traveled solo to Eugene to face paint at Faerieworlds. Now let me describe this: 5 days on a hill with a beautiful river and surrounded by a funky mix of Burning Man types, full on nature loving Pagans, and fairy lovers. I was the only person at my booth, so I didn't have the opportunity to walk around until after hours, when the good fairies head to bed and the bad fairies come out to dance to Tricky Pixie with me. Someone shared some delicious home made mead with me. And Monday morning I finally took the dip in the river that I had been meaning to do since I got there. By then all the guests were gone, the vendors were cleaning up, and it was just me, the sun, the cool water, the tiny fish, the birds and my desire to connect to this land I was visiting- to consciously acknowledge that its air was now my breath, its water flowed through my veins, its fire warmed my heart and its earth supported my body.

Here I am painting at Faerieworlds:

I packed my car, said my goodbyes and headed to Portland to visit one of my best friends and her beautiful daughter.

My last visit to Portland was some eight years prior. I'm happy that things seemed familiar, but at the same time, they seemed better. I spent many hours walking around Hawthorne. And I spent three fantastic days grooving with Rose, who is a fabulous Butoh dancer. She even got me a little face paint gig at a Burning Man going away party, where after the faces were transformed, we danced the night away.

Look, I'm wearing a weird thing on my head!

On my last full day in Portland, I found my friend Ana and we drove down to Arcata.

Arcata, simply put, must be the land of fairies, elves and all mythical creatures that lurk in fog and giggle from treetops. Also, it probably has the most yoga studios per capita in the US. Perhaps what this translates to is that Arcata is beautiful, but it is also gentrified. It is the beautiful small town everyone wants to live in complete with free boxes galore and a weekly farmers market, but you need a bit of money to live here. Ana described it as the impeccable neighborhood of Edward Scissorhands.

But Arcata is pretty wonderful. Everywhere you go there are blackberries waiting for you to eat them. Yes, just waiting for you to pick them off their bushes and to blow off the spiders and bugs and then drop them in your mouth and consume them. And I guerilla face painted at their farmer's market and no cop chased me away.

While I was in Arcata, the new issue of LA Record came out. Here are the illustrations that you'll find in LA Record issue 100 plus a couple others that did not make it to print:

The Wolf Knife (printed- one gigantic page!)

These are quick versions of album covers for the record review section. The second cover made it to print.

After a week in Arcata, I gave Cullen a ride to San Francisco and I continued to Los Angeles via the 101.

In LA, I visited family, friends Tom and Jimmy who are like family, watched Tonya perform with the burlesque troupe The Lalas, and met magickal raw vegan Kate who was visiting from England. I saw Los Lobos perform at Amoeba. I wandered Venice beach in search of massive amounts of sage and saw dolphins slice through the water.

And now, here I am, in Tucson. The heat of Tucson is not unbearable, but really, if you had the choice, why attempt to bear it? And I hide inside until the I look out the attic window and it's dark, like right now.

Tucson and Face Paint update

2010-07-03T14:29:00.001-07:00

So much traveling. For a moment, I felt completely scattered, that I was leaving pieces of me in all places and to try to bring them back to me was too much work. How do you learn to focus when your very existence is about uprooting and moving and riding the wind where ever it may blow?

To find an inner stability that allows to you to be productive in a whimsical lifestyle speaks mountains of the character of the person.

I tried. Maybe I've failed.

But I found a moment of physical stability in Bisbee. I was there for about a month in total. Alone I was able to find my natural rhythm again. And when I found that, I discovered how productive I could be. I would paint, draw, read, write, run, do some yoga and some chores. And when Chris came back from his trip, we began performing poetry at Hot Licks on Tuesday nights. It had been years since I last read in public like that.

My present self crawled through the life of my past self, found some interesting pieces in the closet and tried them on, only to find that they fit better now than they did then.

And to make my desert experience perfect, there was rain. I was in Cochise County when the moon was full, the sky cloudy and the smell of rain permeated every aspect of my life. I cannot properly explain this soul smell, how it activates a primal happiness in me.

Oh yes, and there was Ramsey Canyon. It's like stepping into my heart manifested.

And now time for a general update:

Earth Day with the Wilshire Center was wonderful. I had a great time. Here is a link to the event where you can view photos and videos. Thank you to Mike Russell for being such a great person to work with. It is always a pleasure to work this event and share my talents with other great, talented people and a beautiful community.

Then about a week later I was invited back to the Comic Bug in Manhattan Beach for Free Comic Book Day! Here's a photo of me painting a Venom. And I found a few photos from FCBD 2009 when I painted the Beast, the cutest little kid ever and yet another cutest little kid ever? Is it possible? Just follow the links and you'll see that it is. :)

I'm sending a lot of love to the people at the Comic Bug. They have been fantastic to me, and their store has the best comic book community I've ever met.

Earth Day with the Wilshire Center and the gigs with the Comic Bug are some of my favorite types of events. I get to mingle with all the people, share my talent with anyone and everyone, and instead of focusing on the business aspect of it all, I can just concentrate on making sure everyone is having a great time. It's perfect!

Finally, check out my blog dedicated to FACE PAINT! :) I'm posting all my face painting related info here. Enjoy! FacePaintAmy.blogspot.com.

Face Painting for Wilshire Center's Earth Day Celebration in Los Angeles

2010-04-21T04:51:00.000-07:00

The update:

Guadalajara was amazing! I discovered a wonderful art collective called Colectivo Nahual in downtown Guadalajara. This group of dedicated artists has a gallery and is interested in art exchanges from all over the world. So if you're an artist who has access to a gallery that would be interested in showing art from Guadalajara, we should get in touch.

I was impressed with the overall creative atmosphere there. So much music, lots of art. And there's a real interest in collaboration between the arts. I'm so excited to see where this all goes.

And now I'm in LA for a few weeks, so if you have any event that could use a face painter, email me. :)

In the meantime, I'd like to invite you to this event:

This Thursday is Earth Day! I will be facepainting at the Wilshire Center Earth Day Celebration. There will be performances, music, kids activities, a farmers market. Free entrance. And free facepaint! :) See info below (from their website).

The 3rd Annual Wilshire Center Earth Day/Car Free Day event will take place on the lawn of the Wilshire Park Plaza building at 3700 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90010 (between Oxford and Serrano) on Thursday, April 22nd from 11 AM - 3 PM. This year’s event will feature e-waste recycling, so please bring your old TV, computers, monitors and other electronics to be recycled. The event will also include a tree adoption, seed packet giveaways, sustainability awareness information, and a bike valet.

The main stage will feature musical performances by Naked Rhythm, the Quetzal Guerrero Band, VoKab Kompany, as well as other artists, including a Korean Fan Dance performance, an El Salvadorian dance troupe and Bangladeshi Dancers. In addition to the environmentally friendly aspects and the stage entertainment the event will host a farmer’s market with organic and locally grown produce, gardening training, face painting, drumming for kids, a photo-booth and much more. On April 22nd the WCBID would like to encourage everyone in the City of Los Angeles not to use their cars, but instead use public transportation, carpool, hybrid cars, bike or walk. For more information call 213-487-7003

Guadalajara thoughts.

2010-03-29T17:16:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I've been gone for nearly four months. Four months of corn tortillas, pure spanish and discovery.

Four months of a new reality.

And, most importantly for my gringa self, four months of internet cleansing. :)

But in all seriousness, I leave Guadalajara with a renewed sense of wonder because this time I feel like I met the city on my own terms. I discovered the city for myself, made my own real connections with people, have found a place for art in the center of the heart of Guadalajara. And it's a beautiful feeling.

I feel like I might have left too soon. Or that I need to go back. That despite the fact that there might not be as much money given by the city to support the arts, there is a community willing to incorporate new people and new ideas. I was just beginning to peel the sweet layers of this when we left. I hope that it'll be as fresh and invigorating when I go back.

To get a sense of what I mean, in the 2 1/2 months I was with the art collective Nahual, I participated in three shows (two cafes and one gallery), met bands interested in incorporating art in their performances, body painted, organized a weekly figure drawing workshop and painted and sketched nearly everyday. I was on top of it.

So it's a little weird to leave that.

But I haven't totally left it. The energy stays with me. The connections are made. Projects are in the works.

Things unfold. And things fold back up to unfold in a new way.

I'm in a good mood. :)

Next stop: Austin.

Guadalajara 2

2010-01-18T11:42:00.000-08:00

Guadalajara. I've been here for a month now. We have been traveling a lot around Christmastime- headed to Lake Chapala twice, Arandas twice, Morelia once and to Puerto Vallarta for a weekend. I am officially pooped.

I am happy to announce that I found a wonderful art collective here in Guadalajara. Collectivo Nahual. I happened upon their gallery on my way to the art school in downtown. Hunting for figure drawing workshops, I decided it couldn't hurt to ask this gallery about activities in the Guadalajara art scene. And it was the best thing I could have done. I met Ruben who helps coordinate things in the collective. He informed me that there was a room available for another artist, if I wanted to participate.

A few weeks later, I now have my own little art studio in downtown Guadalajara and have met some very talented and motivated artists.

I am one happy camper.

Almost every day I head over to my studio to work. It's about a 40 minute commute when you include the walk to and from the bus. As soon as I'm over my cold, I'm going to ride the bike to the studio. Once I get there, I greet the people who have already arrived and then to the studio to think, read, draw, play all day. And of course there's time for tea with Miguel who has been a dear in guiding me through the rules and the structure of the collective.

The perfect place for an introvert who likes to experiment with extroversion every once in a while. :)

Guadalajara 1

2009-12-20T15:44:00.000-08:00

It´s been about 10 days since we arrived. No regular internet connection- just the good will of those who will let me zone out on their computer for a few hours. Check all the emails, the facebook, all the inboxes in all the programs of the world. Then to check up on friends, watch an interview, do anything to connect me back to those still in the US.

This time in Mexico, I want to look different. Before I wanted to dress like the Mexican girls, adopt that Mexican fashion, wear makeup their way. But this time I don't want to follow that path. I have this pride (is that the word?) of being different. It's not about being American. It's just about being different. But I think now, looking back, that in general, I´ve had a strong desire to be accepted, but not on their terms. I have to be different and challenge what they want, but also I want to be wanted. It's a bit conflicting.

Our room is set up now so I have a workspace. Already working on a painting for my cousin and also on some Papergirls. I´m also learning more about art here in Guadalajara. More on all of this soon.

For Christmas we're doing a Secret Santa concept. I got my mother in law. She's a spectacular woman who's as sharp as the knives she has in her kitchen. You should see her with her family. Quickest wit on this side of the Mississippi.

Then New Years- we´re talking about Vallarta.

But what I want more than anything is to just rock a dance floor. Dance like a slut to Gaga. :) Or feel the rush of Amanda Palmer. Something that's not nortenio or banda (though I now have a great love for the accordian... more on this later, too).

LA RECORD December 2009- Kronos Quartet meets Rock Band

2009-12-12T13:29:00.000-08:00

This is the latest LA RECORD illustration. How could I pass up a chance to draw Kronos Quartet?

And for those who would like to read the entire interview, check it out
here at larecord.com.

Sierra Vista 1

2009-11-28T21:02:00.000-08:00

Klc is a tattoo king.

My parents found a box of some of my old zine stuff in their house. Lots of old Welcome zine material (the high school friends will understand the importance of that). Also a few sketchbooks from middle school filled with a bunch of invented superheroes. And notebooks and envelopes filled with poetry. God, I wrote so much poetry.

I didn't have time to properly explore my relics of the past, but I hope I will when I get back from Mexico.

Bisbee 3

2009-11-27T19:26:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving with the Arizona family. And I thought about my Mom and my sister back in LA. I hope they had a good time with my uncle and his family.

Tons of pie. My stepmom made an excellent apple pie this year.

Today we spent in Bisbee. We went bird watching and then into town for Bisbee's Christmas lights festivities which involved children performing Santa dances and folkloricos, a marching band and Santa sitting at the end of a really cool old fire engine.

And then it back home. And of course we ate leftovers. And of course I'm in my 3rd food coma since Thanksgiving dinner.

But it's been a good day. The birds were busy and beautiful. Cardinals. Acorn woodpeckers. Blue jays. And tomorrow I finally will make it up to Ramsey Canyon. :) I love that place. It's my recharge spot. My power source. After connecting, I'll be ready to continue this road trip back up to Tucson.

Bisbee 2

2009-11-24T14:11:00.000-08:00

I just realized that I haven't posted art in quite some time. But that will soon change.

I finished an illustration for LA Record. As soon as that's up, I'll share it with you.

And this I finished at the end of October, and it's finally ready to share. I illustrated a few panels of a comic by Mairghread Scott for her website WrongSideComics.com. It was a pleasure working with her, and I'm excited to see her site grow. I can't wait to see what other artists do with her work.

AND there will be more Papergirl. Heeheehee.

In other news, things are going well. I was stressed out for a few days but maybe that's because we're back in holiday season- it's just what happens this time of year. Taking in the quiet. And taking time to work on the art.

Bisbee 1

2009-11-22T21:38:00.001-08:00

I have hit one of my power spots.

Next on the list- the Huachuca Mountains.

Phoenix 1

2009-11-18T16:33:00.000-08:00

We're outside of Phoenix in Avondale. It's day 2. Klc is watching the History Channel. Steve is on the balcony smoking some cigarettes and listening to some music. Jamie is napping with cute baby Marcus. Big Marcus is working. And I'm here thinking about my days.

The trip into Arizona started extremely slow. Between our last minute organizing and goodbyes, we finally got out around the time of rush hour. And luckily there were three of us in the car so we could finally use that I-10 car pool lane. We made three stops along the way because Steve needs his smoke breaks and we needed to move. And finally we arrived to Avondale at 1 or so in the morning.

But I'm glad to see the huge expanse of blue sky. And I'm not a fan of Phoenix, but I'm glad to closer to my desert aesthetic.

Thinking about all this stuff. I'm not sure how this happened, but even with leaving LA, I still find it difficult to focus and I really hoped to have the opposite effect. I'm still trying to keep mental tabs on a million things when really, I just want to deal with right now. Like right now, I just want to deal with this blog.

Taking a moment to just focus on this...

So what's happening the next couple days: dinner with family, trip to Tucson, Chris's birthday in Bisbee... I'm excited. :)

Baby Marcus is looking at me and he's cute!

VEGAS 3

2009-11-11T16:23:00.000-08:00

Vegas is cloudy. The city is pretty with some gray in the sky.

Trying to figure out what the plan is. Not that it really matters, because plans never work out. More so when you're married to someone who doesn't really believe in them. :)

There is a house just down the street from where we're staying. A small four bedroom house with a great yard and a funky 70s theme. $95,000. Pretend house hunting is my adult hobby.

I can't wait to eat a big fucking salad.

Need to throw out more stuff when I'm back in LA. I own too much shit.

Life simplified.

And these are my thoughts right now.

VEGAS 2

2009-11-07T20:51:00.000-08:00

My list of likable things in Vegas:

the Arts Factory- some really great and friendly artists and art lovers.

casinos- not really my scene, but when you've been walking around town for an hour, they have nice, large, clean bathrooms where you can just hang out for a second and collect yourself.

bike/pub crawl- I know there's a real name for this bike ride that happened today, but I don't know it. And even though I didn't attend this time around, I have to promote events that include people on bikes getting together. Added bonus- they bar hop.

casinos- okay, again, not really my scene. But I do love to dance, so Mercy and I went out to Revolution and the Jet at Mirage. People from all over the world come to the casinos and that means I get to meet interesting people while I'm wiggling on the dance floor. Word.

pagan pride peeps- super friendly crew. I met some great people with big hearts. Yeah!

There's my list. Anyone want to add to it?

VEGAS part 1

2009-11-04T23:22:00.001-08:00

The end of my second day in Vegas, and I'm already planning how to tunnel out of here to... anywhere else. Where I'm staying, there's not much to do nearby except walk to Food 4 Less and buy some fruit to eat. Today embarked on an hour hike to the arts district. Best thing I could have ever done. Not only did I get the chance to exercise this body, I became hopeful that Vegas could possibly have something remotely cool.

Maybe I'm being mean. But if you're not into gambling or paying for your sex, what's out here?

Yeah, I'm being mean.

I just needed to vent.

My next list- things I love about Vegas, damnit!

Oh, I already have one for the list! Where else will you see a guy wheeling a horse's skeleton through a shopping center?

Poetry

2009-10-28T11:13:00.000-07:00

Still packing. And found some little goodies-

You

torn sepals from

unborn flowers

****

Take it as blue

wash tint hue.

My monotone

Your boredom

My beauty.

With time

you paint me

with red and

yellows.

I become

purple

green.

I become brown.

Inside, in some

untouched

flesh memory

I am a blue

monotone.

I do not want to

find it.

Then you cannot

change it.

I'm in Tonya Kay's interview

2009-10-27T15:38:00.000-07:00

Well, for a moment. :)

It's a great interview.

And Tonya Kay is a wonderful person. If you don't know about her yet, what's taken you so long? Don't be in the dark any longer! Find out more about Tonya here.

Sharing the Love

2009-10-25T20:40:00.000-07:00

First, it was a great going away party that I'll have to share soon.

Second, I wanted to share this awesome art by my friend Mark is Bisbee. He hand stitches all his dolls and these are the latest ones. They're awesome.

Third, because of the great going away party, I barely got any sleep and must now go and plop into bed.

Preparing for the last week

2009-10-23T23:36:00.000-07:00

So Halloween is our last day in our apartment.

This week has been hellish. I started packing like a monkey throws poop. Occasionally something would land in a box. Then I had an art deadline to meet, but I found it impossible to concentrate with the house in such disarray. So I have been unnecessarily antsy and fidgety and on edge.

Good thing, I'm done with the art. To celebrate I went on a nice evening bike ride. It's been so long since I've been on my bike. Or at least it feels that way.

And I've felt all my emotions to their extreme. Desperation, happiness, anger, hate, relief, love.

I hope this stops soon.

Maybe it's a natural part of moving. I'm forced to look at all the projects I said I was going to finish but never did. It's not a pretty thing to do. Not only does it generate a lot of self directed anger, it's an eye opener. Instead of continuing the thought pattern of "I must finish these projects now," I'm changing my perspective to analyze why I haven't finished these projects, what does that say about my real interests, and can I accept this version of myself. I know it sounds silly, but people like to hold onto their self illusions. Sometimes it's okay to be less than what you thought you were.

Tomorrow is the going away party. I need to buy food. I need to put items out tomorrow morning for the yard sale. And I need to clean house.

But at least I don't have that art deadline anymore.

Multitasking is my enemy.

Moving Moving Moving

2009-10-17T12:46:00.000-07:00

Packing is a horrible experience. I don't wish it on anyone.

Here's my latest craiglist ad. Selling furniture... fun...

The Last Few Weeks

2009-10-15T22:40:00.000-07:00

I have been hiding out.

There have been a couple projects I had to work on that were TOP SECRET.

Well, maybe not that hush hush. I guess there are a few things I'd rather not talk about. It's all about not dissipating the energy. :)

But now the energy is where it's going to be and it's time to talk about them! The last few weeks I've been working on some coloring book pages for an orthodontist office and a few panels to a short comic written by Mairghread Scott. These I will post when the finals are finished.

And I drew the my illustration for the latest LA RECORD. Kid Congo Powers. It's pretty sweet, but it does look suspiciously like the guy from the Red Meat comics.

AND on top of all that, I was at my ten year high school reunion in Sierra Vista. Holy crap, the trip was amazing. Wednesday I took the Amtrak out to Tucson ($38 each way- how do you top that?) and visited a few friends while there. In Sierra Vista Stephani took me up in her awesome two person plane nicknamed "the Tuna Can". It was wonderful despite the funny queasy feeling in my stomach. At our reunion we met old friends and easily had the happiest table at the event. Then on Sunday I was on Bisbee's one watt community radio station. I was a "Tori Amos expert" for Krudzo Tablitzski's BisbraInsane show. The next day Mrs. Tablitzski and I went on a calming hike through the Chiricahuas. Tuesday I did some last minute visiting with friends and was home by Wednesday morning.

What a week!

And if you haven't heard, I'm leaving LA. Really, it's all Berlin's fault. Klc and I went to Germany for a couple weeks in July, and it blew us away. We forgot how much we love to travel. So we're taking the next bit of our lives to be mobile, to feel our joints move, to explore new lands and seas and see where the winds blow us.

It's going to be beautiful and exciting.

Here I'm sharing some art and some life. :)

The Last Alien!

2009-09-26T12:54:00.000-07:00

The last of the aliens for the "Femme from Mars" show. I was so happy to see the people that came out to support me. You made my day!

And I think this will be my last show in LA for a while because I'm moving! Woot! Guadalajara, here I come! Traveling days are here again!

Klimt Loves Aliens. Take 2.

2009-09-24T14:57:00.000-07:00

The second painting for the "Femmes from Mars" show at the Hive tomorrow night. Working on one more...

You can find details about the show a few posts ago.

A Room of One's Own

2009-09-19T14:25:00.000-07:00

Here's the last chapter. It moved me as I was reading it in the laundry mat.

Face Painting Video

2009-09-18T21:40:00.000-07:00

Thank you to WLCAC and Shahid for inviting us to the 2009 Vision and Vibes Festival. This video is so great! :) I had seen parts of the video prior to editing but not this finished product. This made my day! :D

Femmes from Mars

2009-09-16T18:32:00.000-07:00

So I'm going to be in Femmes from Mars show on September 25th at the Hive Gallery and Studios. I'm working on various paintings for the event, one of which I'm sharing below. Who knew Klimt loved aliens?

.... I did. :P

And here's the press release:

September 25th, 2009
Feminine Oddities LLC
http://www.feminineoddities.com
Presents:
“Femmes From Mars”
What:

“Femmes From Mars!” A space naughty oddity night!! September 25th, 2009 the Feminine Oddities host an extra-terrestrial extravaganza of music, performance, art, and more! The Femmes from Mars have landed on Earth for a one night only show! We will be celebrating the Femmes arrival with “out of this world” performances of burlesque “ode et tease”, humor, and music. Beings of all galaxies will come together for an unforgettable night that you don’t want to miss!! So take the nearest shuttlecraft to the Hive to see what happens when Martians and Earthlings collide!!

Feminine Oddities Artists:
Debra Haden, Donna Letterese, David Foto, Nikki Windham, Audrey McNamara, Amy Hagemeier, 4614, and more…….

Performances (subject to change check website for updates!!)
Music:
bavab bavab
Uncle Alien
Tek Support
Sexy and Comedic Performances:

Feminine Oddities:
Special “Ode et Tease” performance includes singing, tease, and humor.

Featuring:
Deb’onaire
‘Rey’diance DeVille
D.V.L
Ronnie Schultz
J.T. Reece
Joseph Kim

Special Guest and Emcee:
Actress and Radio Personality: Ronnie Schultz

When:
September 25th, 2009 doors open at 8:30pm- Midnight. Performances start at 9:00pm.
$5 come dressed as a wookiee, droid, Starfleet Officer, Femme Fatale Martian, etc.!! All galaxies welcome!!
BYOB
Where:
The Hive Gallery
729 S. Spring St.
Los Angeles, CA 90014

Music Video!

2009-09-15T15:22:00.000-07:00

Hibernation

2009-09-13T16:29:00.001-07:00

It's a quiet day, that is, if you erase the sound of me laughing at myself for the silly things I do when I'm alone.

Like what?

Like watch the Christian the Lion video (again) and crying about how amazing life/animals are (again). Things like that.

But outside of my tangents into the emotional, today has been a quiet and mostly productive day. I've been working on a few illustrations to send to a friend, and they will be finished by deadline. I've been cleaning house. I've been digging up the dirt on Neil Gaiman (why didn't anyone tell me he was dating Amanda Palmer? *sigh*). A good day.

And now for the interlude. In less than an hour I will be on my way to Patrick's Roadhouse for the next Spirits with Spirits. Armed with Tarot cards, I'm hoping to pick up on some activity or get insight on any presence that is lingering. Still waiting my first apparition, but it will come one day, I'm sure. I just need to exercise that part of my brain some more.

I can feel my spirits lift as I write this. Not that I was in a bad place before, but I am definitely in a better place now.

New LA RECORD illustration

2009-09-12T11:26:00.000-07:00

Just a nice Saturday morning. Before I leave to paint at a couple birthday parties, I wanted to share the newest illustration for LA RECORD. Too bad it never saw print, because I really liked this one. Poop.

The Felice Brothers.

Mr. President

2009-09-06T22:34:00.000-07:00

I'm going to LACMA tomorrow and hope to see more of this.

Y0UNG-HAE CHANG HEAVY INDUSTRIES

Can You Endure?

2009-09-06T00:26:00.000-07:00

This is so ridiculous. So I'm sharing it here.

September's SPIRITS with SPIRITS ~ Ghost Hunters of Urban Los Angeles

2009-09-03T11:09:00.000-07:00

The latest GHOULA info! Patrick's Roadhouse, here we come! And you guys have to RSVP to this one. Follow the link for complete details.

September's SPIRITS with SPIRITS ~ Ghost Hunters of Urban Los Angeles

I am on a roll...

2009-09-01T20:07:00.001-07:00

I'm currently watching an interview with Genesis P Orridge. It's long, but it's full of theory and the things people do to keep from being bored.

LA RECORD illustrations so far.

2009-09-01T19:21:00.000-07:00

...and conveniently collected in one simple post. I'm quite proud of these. I enjoy playing with the washes and exploring creative ways of incorporating all members of a band in a cohesive and (ideally) fun drawing. Starting from the latest to the oldest...

Black Joe Lewis and The Honeybears (love their stuff):

The Dub Club:

The Zeros:

The Handsome Furs:

The Sadies:

Take Off!

2009-09-01T17:51:00.000-07:00

Here we go. As the fires eat up the hills of Los Angeles, I am going to begin this new blog. There's a need to start again from scratch, learn a new system and adapt to it. I will still be on Myspace and Facebook, but I want this to be my new home.

The heat is pretty unbearable. And I'm an Arizona girl.

A quick intro: I grew up in Cochise County, got my BA in Studio Art with a minor in Spanish, traveled some, moved to LA years ago and am finding direction in my life... finally.

I'm not really sure what all I will post up here. I battle with this idea of being purely professional ("And here is my latest illustration!") versus adding some personal revelations (or trifles, if you prefer). And I suppose sharing these thoughts mean I'm actually leaning toward the latter. So this whole paragraph is sort of ridiculous! :)

But I will also post my latest art- paintings, the latest Papergirl, illustrations for LA Record, GHOULA (Ghost Hunters of Urban Los Angeles) flyers, etc. But if you want the face paint, you'll have to go the the other blog. :)

And so I begin this blog. And let me share a painting. This one always makes me happy.

I disappeared for a month

2009-08-16T20:39:00.000-07:00

To Berlin and to Austin.

Both green places with water and trees.